Bonking Boris Boorishly Birthing Baby

Where was Boris Johnson in the midst of the storms and coronavirus outbreak? Taking care of baby business!

Boris Bonking Baby

Britain suffered through three of the worst storms in 13 years last month. Storms CIARA, Dennis and Jorge lashed several areas, leaving a trail of death, carnage and transport chaos. At least three people died, and hundreds injured as the storms flooded homes, towns and roads.

During and after this time Prime Minister Boris Johnson did not see it fit to visit displaced households or families mourning their dead. In the absentia Labour opposition, led by former leader Jeremy Corbyn, highlighted Johnson’s inaction and absence.

Wholly Inadequate

Corbyn called the government’s response ‘wholly inadequate’ and accused ministers of failing to grasp the scale of the climate crisis. “In refusing to visit flood-hit communities, nowhere-to-be-seen Boris Johnson is showing his true colours by his absence,” Corbyn said.

The answer to where Johnson actually was became clear on Saturday. It came just as a different storm, that over Home Secretary Priti Patel’s brouhaha with her civil servants spilled over with senior civil servant Philip Rutnam resigning and issuing an announcement to sue for constructive dismissal.

Fear Fostering

Specifically, Rutnam targeted Patel’s alleged part in the ‘pattern of abuse in the government’, and accused her of ‘fostering a climate of fear’. Then, just like the fictional Jack-in-the-box, up pops Johnson to announce he had become engaged and his fiancé Carrie Symonds was pregnant and expecting a baby. This announcement could not had better timing.

In one fell swoop, the news wiped all other conversations off the board. And, it became clear that while Britain was being lashed (and killed) by severe snow, wind, rain and treacherous road conditions, Johnson was working on his ‘tan’ and making a little man. At the very least, squatting on the egg and waiting for it to hatch…

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